The First Day of the Rest of My Life!

Well folks the day is here-Surgery Day! I thought that I would have butterflies but to the contrary, I have such peace. Yesterday I was like a five year old on Christmas Eve, I wanted to hurry up and get to sleep so I could wake up. It's just so exciting! I stayed up pretty late last night getting the last minute things together for my family to be able to function without me. I'm sure I've forgot something but hubby is more than able to handle it.

I can't even explain how refreshing it is to have the support that everyone is giving. From prayers, to warm wishes, to asking if they can help out, I've really felt God's love through His people. Just think, I thought about doing this in silence. Just letting my inner circle know. I don't really know why either. There's no reason I should feel ashamed, yet I know that there are so many that do. I don't know how bariatric surgery is frowned upon by so many. Do I think it should be a last resort? Absolutely and once a person makes that decision I don't think they should feel like they are "cheating" at weight-loss. It's as if bariatric surgery is somehow a lesser form of weight loss. I don't think so. It takes the same will power and determination to stay at it.

I digress...it's about that time. Hubby and I are headed to the hospital. The procedure is from 9:00 am to 12:30 pm. If you think about me during that time, pray for me. Thanks! Below I've attached some before pictures. Feel free to take your time and say 'Good-bye' to the old Syree.
 

                                                        Before-Front                                                                                    Before-Side

A few days later...

So it's been a few days since my "big announcement" and honesty I am overwhelmed by the support. I went to an event the day after my last blog with many people that I knew had read it. At first I felt incredibly vulnerable, but I was greeted with such love and acceptance that, that original feeling soon faded. My hope is that in me sharing my journey, someone will be helped. This is not just for those considering bariatric surgery, but to motivate others to share their story. The bible says in Revelation 12:11 that they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony... Him being satan. It is our witness that motivates others to get through what they are going through. Inside of all of us lies what each of us needs. We just have to be willing to release it.

...and the journey begins!

I've always been successful at anything I've put my mind to. If I decide I want to do something, I work hard and I get it done. I want a great marriage. I work hard and am super intentional, therefore I have a great marriage. When I was working, I worked hard and would knock it out of the park. I work really hard to raise respectful children with good manners. My kids are great kids.  I wanted to be a homeowner, so I saved, got really disciplined and bought a house. Now I'm not saying all of this to be boastful. I know that I could not have done any of these things without Christ being the center of my life, but had I not done my part I wouldn't have gotten far at all.

With all of this success, I still struggle with my weight. It's the one thing that no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to get control over.  I can't even count how many journal entries I have that start with "This is it." Shortly lived, I get back into my old habits of eating the wrong things and not exercising. Now on top of all that I deal with several diagnosis: fibromyalgia, bursitis and arthritis. These things keeping me in terrible pain almost always. I fight through and go to spin class at 5 am and eat all the right things for the rest of the day. Then I wake up the following day and my body is angry with me. None of the pain meds work that will allow me to function throughout the day and I refuse to lay in the bed all day. So I push past it. This works for awhile until it gets unbearable and I have to lay in the bed. Feeling like a failure I almost always turn to food. My comfort.

This has become my pattern. So about 2 years ago I started to research bariatric surgery. At first I wasn't interested, thinking that this was just the easy way out. After my research I realized that it wasn't the easy way out at all. In fact, the only easy part was the surgery itself. After the surgery, was the hardest work ever! So I prayed and I asked God if he was cool with this (I mean I was reorganizing my piping). After I got His okay, my husband and I talked about it at length. He was also in full support. I went to therapy to change my thinking about food. Before I decided to do this I needed to get my mind ready for such a dramatic change. So after all of this I started the process of approval for the surgery 9 months ago. Fast-forward to today and I have been approved.

On October 27, (6 days) I will be having gastric-bypass surgery. I don't want it to be a secret, so what better way to get the word out then through a blog. I know some of you will say, "I don't think you should get it. Your so tall, you don't look like you need it. When I think of gastric bypass, I think of those really heavy people." Well, I have become one of those really heavy people. No matter what your shape is and how you appear to look to others, there is nothing like the sting of getting on a scale and it saying...320 lbs. That's my reality people and I've decided to do something about it...and the journey begins!!!!!